2.12.23 diet journal + RANDOM ENCOUNTER

Friday night didn’t go as well as I hoped, though it could have also been much worse. I’m not going to put the log for that day down since I ate out afterwards and had no real way to track my main meal plus the apps I nommed on as well. I did at least try to go low carb as possible. I had a steak salad and some chicken wings. I also ate a bit of my partner’s fries and my wife’s onion rings. Though to try to be a bit more compassion to myself, I had just gotten through an intense moment. Just earlier in the evening I had to call 911 and mentally prepare myself to fight off a pack of teens.

I should probably rewind a little.

After the improv event, we (my wife, my partner, and an old roommate) decided to drive to a nearby restaurant (Note to self: try to anticipate eat out events and eat significantly less during the day to compensate). We were driving through a nice seeming neighborhood with a bunch of townhomes everywhere and even a little lake called “Inspiration Lake”. There were literal white picket fences everywhere, which also makes me think the HOA in the area must rule with an ironfist.

As we turned a corner, we saw this group of about 10 or so caucasian teens in what seemed like some sort of melee. There was a teen girl on the floor. I wasn’t able to register much more than that before my partner with big Gryffindor energy jumped out of the car to intervene. They told me to call 911 right now. I could feel my usual fine motor controls starting to slip away as the adrenaline in my body started to build. I also realized that I never had to call 911 for a real emergency before. I had only ever done test calls when setting up phone systems for work. I clumsily tapped through the phone interface and dialed 911. As the call started to go out, I looked up and saw my partner right inside the pack. I could hear what I assumed to be the lead male teen apologizing. The pack started to separate and walk down the alleyway and around the corner. My partner followed them as the teen continued to apologize. Alarm bells in my head started going off as I realized I was potentially going to lose line of sight on all the people. So I got out of the car, phone making a weird screeching sound in my ear, and followed. Since I was so focused on the call, I had not gotten a good look at the body language of all the people involved and so I couldn’t tell what the odds of violence were…but I was very worried. I felt my body bracing.

Normally when it comes to fight or flight responses, my go to is Freeze, then Flight when possible. That functioned well enough in my solo life. But now I found myself in a situation when someone I loved was at potential risk. That is a *much* different feeling. I suppose this is where my Slytherin kicks in. Left to my own devices, I would have honestly not gotten involved. I have a ton of traumas around groups of people, which is where the flight response has been so handy. But my loyalty to the people I care about the most overrides everything else.

While it isn’t the same case, I feel I can better understand parents when it comes to their children being at risk (at least in that direct obvious to see way). This reminded me that I really do need to get back into functional martial arts training. Especially if I do end up having a kid. While I might be able to talk my way out of a situation and have a strong enough danger sense to avoid situations that involve violence, the ones I care about might not.

Back to the stats.

2.10.23 Diet Journal

I was super busy and wasn’t able to get my log in yesterday morning so I’ll double up today. The important bit is I didn’t do great on the diet yesterday. I had 3 of those protein cookies that make me fart like the devil made me do it and a cauliflower pizza half The calories weren’t overall that bad but the problem was I didn’t stick to the plan and say “no” like I’ve been trying to focus on. I’ll have another chance to succeed today. Also the fact that my weight stayed the same despite that means had I stuck to the plan, I most likely would have closed on getting under 210. Just gotta keep at it.

The stats:

Estimate for today (2-10-23). Doing improv and wine tonight, expected snacks to reserved space.

2.8.23 diet log

Diet went well yesterday. There are complications with my gym billing (CC expiration change) and they’re being ridiculously annoying when it comes to updating my billing info. Without that fixed I can’t register for bootcamp classes. I just walked in and did a strength training session instead (push/pull), which doesn’t burn as many straight calories (though of course it is beneficial in many other ways). I did get in a 20 minute walk in the afternoon as well…would have liked a little longer but the day just felt so busy and even that walk got delayed until like 3pm. Oh and I discovered our dishwasher is down (motor maybe?) so that’s more time spent and more stress on another thing to need to pay for. Anyhow, stats for yesterday:

Vertical Push/pull db short 2023 feb sf
Tuesday 7 Feb 2023, 05:47

SUPERSET
Incline Bench Press (Dumbbell)
Set 1: 20 lbs × 10 [Warm-up]
Set 2: 35 lbs × 14 @ 9.0
Set 3: 35 lbs × 12 @ 8.5
Set 4: 35 lbs × 12 @ 9.5
Set 5: 35 lbs × 10 @ 10.0
Lat pulldown sd
Set 1: 100 lbs × 12
Set 2: 120 lbs × 10
Set 3: 100 lbs × 12
Set 4: 100 lbs × 12
Sf seated row
Set 1: 100 lbs × 12
Set 2: 120 lbs × 10
Set 3: 100 lbs × 12
Set 4: 100 lbs × 12

SUPERSET
Skullcrusher (Dumbbell)
Set 1: 20 lbs × 10 @ 10.0 [Failure]
Set 2: 20 lbs × 10 @ 9.5 [Failure]
Set 3: 20 lbs × 10 @ 9.5 [Failure]
Incline Curl (Dumbbell)
Set 1: 20 lbs × 10 @ 9.5
Set 2: 20 lbs × 9 @ 9.5
Set 3: 20 lbs × 10 @ 10.0

SUPERSET
Face pull soldierfit
Set 1: 100 lbs × 12
Set 2: 100 lbs × 12
Set 3: 100 lbs × 12
Sf tricep overhead extension
Set 1: 40 lbs × 12
Set 2: 40 lbs × 14
Set 3: 40 lbs × 12
Soldierfit straight arm pulldown
Set 1: 90 lbs × 12
Set 2: 90 lbs × 12 @ 9.5
Set 3: 90 lbs × 8 [Failure]
Front raise cable sf
Set 1: 20 lbs × 14
Set 2: 30 lbs × 12 @ 8.5
Set 3: 30 lbs × 10 [Failure]

Diet Journal 2.6.23

Better late than never to start. The weekend didn’t go super great. I found myself strapped for time while prepping for D&D and post-clean up and ended up ordering out twice on saturday (Ihop, then caltort). I thought I could get away with it because I got my bootcamp in and was walking/standing around for 4 hours while I hosted my game. That just wasn’t true. Oh, and my sis came home late and offered me a small cinnamon roll and I took it. Next time I either need to do a wrap setup (small ones only) and be happy with that or do the yogurt w/ protein spike setup. I also need to be strict on not eating unnecessary things. Being short on time should not be an excuse for eating out.

On friday, I was doing fairly well until I added carby meals/sweets with my dinner that set me back some more. Though I wasn’t physically active at all Friday either, not even a good walk.

I need to be more comfortable saying No to foods not on my diet plan. I was able to do that with sodas when I first lost a lot of weight, I can do the same here. I also need to make sure no snack foods are in plain sight. I need to ask my wife and my sister to please not leave that stuff outside. In fact, I need to ask them to put it away rather than me doing it…or they will never learn. I’m wondering if I should institute a 3 strikes rule as well…if I have to ask 3 times and it is still there, I’m tossing it.

This needs to come down.

Here is today’s plan. Hopefully I can stick to it. Yes it is on the low side, but obviously I have a good amount of fat I can tap into. When I get leaner I’m going to, somewhat counterintuitively, eat a bit more.

2.2.23 food struggles

I’m doing the workouts. I’m failing at the diet. I know it is hard, especially long term, but I need to have zero tolerance for foods outside my diet. At least for now. No snacking. No chips. Stick to the plan.

Idea that occurred to me during this morning’s bootcamp session. I’m going to try journaling my diet here. I’m not including the cals/macros here since that’ll take significantly more time. I just need to see my choices written.