I had a bit of a talk with my wife last night regarding the challenges I’m having. I recently started reading through “The ADHD effect on Marriage”, which has been very on point for the experience. I understand the symptoms are a bit beyond her, but nonetheless I’m effected.
So today I was feeling it again just looking through social media. And an anger came over me, at myself. I’m tired of hating on myself. I am starting to look at the medication route after a message from my aunt (who is a psychiatrist) but in the mean time I’m doubling up on my fitness goal. And my competitiveness. I need that fire to burn away the darkness. The mixed blessing is that with no fair this year I don’t have those extra calories and reduced workout time to worry about. I’m committing to the idea of getting ripped by my 40th birthday. I don’t know how long I’ll be able to hold onto that status when I get there, but just to do it the one time will be enough. I need to be able to look at myself for once and not have those doubts.
I have a good trainer. I have a good diet plan with consistent tracking. I have enough tools at home to supplement the training I do. I can make this happen.
5 minute bike. Just writing down all the exercises I did. I can’t remember how many sets I did.
banded side walk with resist band above knees
- banded side walk with resist band above knees
- Farmer’s carry with 35lb DBs
- Deadlift green KB
- 10 tire flips
- Farmer’s carry back
- squat with 35 db, stop at box
- box jumps on tire
- single leg step up (keep foot on box) no weight (15 reps)
- Single leg step up with 35lb weight (lowest box)
- pistol squats with trx
- reverse lunge with trx (make sure back knee just about gets to floor)
- banded pullups 3 sets. I got up to 15 reps with green.
Circuit base but with reps instead of time blocks. Aimed for 10 reps, then 6 reps with heavier weights on last 2 rounds
- Wide grip lat pull down 80,100,120,140,160
- Cable pull 30lb? Can’t remember
- Single arm rows 25, end with 35
- Curved bar curl, wide supinated grip, wide pronated grip, close supinated grip, wide pronated grip…60,60,60,40
- single arm alternate grip (start neutral), 20lb?
- Next set
- Inclined curls 20lb
- heavier single arm rows
- Preacher curls 15lb
- wide grip pull up with assist band x10, for total of 50 reps
I think some of the insecurities that are flaring up for me are due to me not being particularly happy with myself. Fixing my body has long been a big part of that. I can’t depend on my interactions with other people to help me there…unreliable, and it can back fire as well if I don’t trust myself well enough.
Doing other things to, part of that building competencies, helps too. My options have been limited and gaming has not been so helpful as of late. Honestly gaming hasn’t been that helpful for a long time. I did feel dancing helped as I was building a skill, and touch was nice too. Online stuff won’t help there and I need people to work with, it is very much a touch thing.
Strength training was great too, but there aren’t any options for that right now. I tried finding stuff online but with COVID-19 there is just nothing to get. Hmm what if I take out the canopy at least? Weather can be a problem though. Especially wind.
Ok here’s what I think I need to do for now…
Since my body is making me get up early anyway, maybe either do a walk around the neighborhood or try to get a morning hike in (early is better for less people too). I’d probably have to start by 7:30…it is roughly 30 minutes to do the whole thing? Maybe budget 40 for the drive back and forth. Then continue with the lunch time run. Solderfit zoom workout at 6. What about saturday/sunday? Well if I keep waking early I can do the 9am zoom workout still. I need to text cesar about strength training options while on lockdown…hopefully I get something. I need to grind harder than ever now. I also need to be stricter on the diet now.
What else can I do in this climate to keep feeling like I’m improving?
Today’s workout was the Murphy…or something to that effect. I don’t know the whole story but it is related to memorial day. The setup goes like this:
- 1 mile run under 9 min or substitute the following (not equivalent at all imo)
- 200 jumping jacks
- 100 mountain climbers
- 100 toe taps
- 100 lunges
- 50 kb swings
- 100 pull-ups
- 200 push-ups
- 300 squats
- Repeat mile or substitute
I still owe 100 push-ups, 20 pull ups, and the mile or substitute
I think I need to stick to using gloves as the weights get heavier. Bruised up the palm of my left hand. Anyhow…
- 200m row warmup
- 10×2 squats with bar only
- 50lb 10×2
- 60lb 6×2
- 70lb 4×4
- Superset x3:
- 30 lb incline press x8
- 12lb fly x10
- Plank reverse fly 10lb
- Superset 2..4 sets:
- Pulldowns (chinup position) 160lb x8
- Rows 40lb x12
- Yellow kb upright rows 3×8 (remember to pull outwards at top)
- Yellow kb reverse dead lift 3×12
- Yellow kb side lunge 10/leg one set
- One arm squat thrust 30lb 3×8…cut short because of hand issue… switched to band
- Superset 4:
- Bosu ball side shuffle x40
- Red band looped around pillar, one knee up, press band out…core twist resist
- 10 flutter kicks, 1 leg up, repeat and increment raise 2..then 3
This morning’s session below. I’m also having a strength training session tonight. I guess I have a bit of anxiety over how I’ll do. I also rolled out my hips, glutes, and calves this morning. I should do that again this afternoon. Hips were a bit tight. Not sure if we’re doing squats or deadlifts tonight.
- High knees
- Butt kickers
- Break line
- Bear crawl forward and backwards
- Jog up hill
- End warmup
- Arm rotations, hip flexor stretch, hip thrusts…mix in push-ups or mountain climbers between.
- Circuit 1, 15 reps a station
- Rope slams with split lunges
- One leg hip thrusts with med ball
- Mountain climbers x4 with sliders, pushup
- Tire thrusts
- Circuit 2:
- Large tire flip x5
- Box jumps
- Trx squat jump
- Sled push
- Circuit 3, timed, abs:
- Use water bottle or kb for center..alternate leg 1 by 1 over item
- In and outs
- V ups
- To tune of Thunderstruck, burpees Everytime thunder is said. Squats in between.
Writing down what I remember of last session so I can figure out a lighter version to do on my own
- 500m row warmups
- Bar squat x12
- Heavy Weighted bar squat,x8 for 5 sets
- Warm-up good mornings x12
- Heavy good morning 3set,8 rep
- Shoulder shrugs
- Hammer curl, bicep curl 12, 5..3 sets
- Shoulder press, lat raises
- Pull-up bar hold, 10 single each leg raise, 5 both leg up
- 10 leg raise on bar
- Med ball sitting turn press…core tight emphasis
- Reverse fly
- Chinup pulldown